We’ve all been there… coming off a painful breakup and using retail therapy to ease our aching heart. The problem was that, at the time of my retail therapy, the stress of the breakup had caused me to lose a rather large (and unsustainable) amount of weight. But all I could think about as I wandered around Macy’s was that I needed something to fill that empty void: a dress to rival all other dresses. And then I saw it… a rather unassuming dress, but something about it attracted me. I had never purchased a dress named after a woman, so I had no idea what the significance of a Betsey Johnson dress was. I simply took my very svelte self into the dressing room and put it on.
What happened next can only be described as magic. I had never worn a dress that so perfectly outlined my silhouette. I had never put on a dress that instantly made me want to have sex with myself. I had also never paid almost $500 for an article of clothing. But, standing there in that dressing room, I knew that I must.
Time went by, and I got over Mr. Heartbreak. I gained back a healthy amount of weight and never wore that dress outside my home. At some point, I stopped being able to squeeze my ass into it, but I could not bear to part with it. It has been hanging in my closet ever since, and I had convinced myself that it was never to fit me. Until today…
I recently lost 15 pounds, and although not down to my breakup weight, I decided on a whim to try the dress on. I lovingly took it out of the closet and stepped into it. It was a little snug around my bottom, but I gingerly tugged it up. What’s this? I can zip it up? Eek! I couldn’t be entirely sure that it entirely fit because, oddly, it is impossible to completely “do up” the dress without assistance. (Clearly this dress is only to be worn when going out with a companion.) But it did zip as far as I could manage, and I could still breath! What is even more amazing is that, in my mind, the dress was a size 8, but I checked the tag today, and it’s a size 10… that’s my size! Why had I thought all these years that it would always be too small?
As you can imagine, I am scouting out a location to wear the dress in its first public debut.
And I totally forgive Mr. Heartbreak now after harboring years of resentment over the inability to wear this dress.